Back Bane

Sleeping injury.

Got any pills? Allow me to rephrase: do you have any ibuprofen? I ask because I recently pulled a back muscle and am experiencing just enough pain to make me uncomfortable, but not enough to justify loudly whining to Wife about it (pretty much the worst kind of pain there is). The best I can do is keep popping over-the-counter pain meds and quietly tell myself that I’m a brave boy who is going to get a big ice cream when he gets home from work tonight. Granted, I eat ice cream pretty much all the time, but it’s fun to pretend, isn’t it? I suppose I should get to the most embarrassing part of this story, since you readers seem to respond most actively to tales of minor misfortune. I pulled this irksome back muscle while I was sleeping. That’s right. WHILE SLEEPING. If any of you have experienced a similar fate, you know just how pathetic one feels when discovering upon waking that their body is so weak it got injured performing the most passive activity possible. I suppose if you are a serial sleepwalker, and you routinely somnambulate your way into 24 Hour Fitness Centers to sleep-lift, that’s a different matter entirely. But for those of us deep sleepers who can’t handle the cloud-like consistency of mattresses and pillows, sleeping is a very dangerous activity indeed. Maybe I should start wearing my hockey equipment to bed. Sure, it reeks, but that’s the price you pay for peace of mind: smelliness.

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13 thoughts on “Back Bane

  1. take uristat it makes the buirnng and pain disappear while it goes thru the uninary tract, it will however turn ur urine browish colored. but it makes it much more comfortable. and lots of water. but if u have pyridium this is the same thing. how did an epidural cause a UTI? epidurals are in the spine and the catheters used for the unrinary tract are different. heat on the spots that are bothing u, and cool washcloths after u pee over the exit of the urethra.

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  2. I know the pain of stupid back injuries. In 2004 I once made the mistake of picking something up off a coffee table and BAM. Recurring back pain episodes every 3-4 months ever since, usually when I either sleep or rise from a chair incorrectly. I’ve now developed a tolerance to ibuprofen and had to try another OTC option instead. Stupid, emasculating back pain.

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